Monday, December 08, 2008

Word to husbands this Christmas

Watch and learn:


Ouch.

I myself, once, early in our marriage, gave my dear wife... I gave her.... gave her a set of.....

No, I can't. I just can't.

I meant well. I was young. Younger.

She was very gracious. Thank God.

And I never did it again.

(h-t- Jollyblogger)

26 comments:

Kim said...

I just want you to know that last year, for my birthday, I received...

a vacuum cleaner.

I wanted a new desk chair.

Guess whose idea it was to buy me a vacuum cleaner? My daughter... whose sensibilities with regard to what constitutes a mess are just as poorly tuned as her father's.

It was not a great vacuum cleaner.

candy said...

Once, I had a boyfriend who was not the one for me I came to realize. Sooooo...on Valentine's Day he took me to dinner and had a tiny box wrapped up prettily. I was really nervous hoping it wasn't a significant piece of jewelry.

I opened the box to reveal a mini Leatherman. I was so happy! I breathed a sigh of relief. I still have it too.

chrish said...

My fiancee asked for tires for her birthday. Tires! What is a man supposed to do when that happens? Who asks for tires when they don't mean it?

Fortunately, she actually did mean it. I didn't get her tires, though. No way.

DJP said...

It was probably a test/trick/trap.

They do that.

philness said...

Gardening tools. She said she wanted to start gardening. It was a really cool set- all in one container. With pull out drawers even.

CR said...

Hmmm...that's interesting Kim and a good work around for fathers and a get of out the doghouse card if they mess up. Say that the daughter or son wanted to get the present for mom.

Mesa Mike said...

My wife bought me a vacuum cleaner for Christmas one year.

But I think I was already in The Doghouse.

Jeff said...

As a former gym owner I would always advise a well intentioned young man against the purchase of a membership for his bride/girlfriend. Always.

I did buy a dutch oven for my wife for Christmas one year. I did have the foresight to place a very nice set of ear rings inside. The bruising subsided after about a week and the dutch oven works like a champ.

Rabbit said...

My father gave my mother electric grass clippers for Mother's Day one year.

I don't know that he ever lived that one down, poor Dad.

Gentlemen, ask your lovely wife/fiancee to set up an Amazon Wish List. I would call it Doghouse Prevention Insurance.

witness said...

My downfall was a new fishing pole for her birthday.

I really thought she wanted to go with me!

Who would have thought she would see it as a way for me to get myself a new one... a really nice new one.

Rabbit said...

About 15 years ago (pre-children) my husband was longing for one of those plug-into-the-tv game systems. He repeatedly talked about it and I repeatedly voiced my indifference, thinking it would be a waste of money and something only he would enjoy.

Lo and behold, it showed up under the Christmas tree with a "TO: Mom and Dad FROM: Chinook" tag on it. Seems our DOG had gone out and purchased the thing, wrapped it and put it under the tree for us. Bless her little waggy-tailed heart.

Angie B. said...

I would LOVE a vacuum cleaner for Christmas. Jewelry is never on my list. I'm really hoping for a vacuum cleaner, a frying pan, and two living room chairs.

Really and truly. Those things delight me. One of my favorite gifts ever was a set of disposable cutting boards for meat.

DJP said...

...aaaaaand when all my single male readers ask me for your contact information, I should tell them you're already married, right?

CR said...

Jeff: As a former gym owner I would always advise a well intentioned young man against the purchase of a membership for his bride/girlfriend. Always.

So, let me guess, the old, when the guy says "do you want to join a gym" and her response of "what...are you saying I'm fat?!" argument.

JustJan said...

2 years ago my husband bought me an industrial type shredder for the office. We still use the thing every day. I thought it was a great Christmas gift.

He is still waiting for me to get him a Corvette.

Can you see which one of us is the practical one?

Barbara said...

Crish! Dude!

You know what tires cost these days? And what precious cargo rides on top of them?

*sigh* and how often I have to replace them... I wish somebody'd give me a set of tires (with great warrantees) mounted and balanced for my birthday/christmas/whatever....

Jewelry? Who needs jewelry? Can't wear it to work, never go out, all vanity anyway. Tires, man!

Well, there's still time to wish for a roof...

chrish said...

Barbara,
I told her once that if she tells me she wants something, there is an excellent chance she will get it. It saves all the hinting, but still leaves the chance I will surprise her with something she didn't know she wanted.

And she was serious about the tires. She's a good one.

CR said...

MM: My wife bought me a vacuum cleaner for Christmas one year.

But I think I was already in The Doghouse.


Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

John S. said...

I got put in the doghouse by the wife of a friend that I sent this link to.

Annemarie said...

If I wasn't holding my 3 month old baby, I would be on the floor laughing. That was great! Thanks for the holiday entertainment. :-)

~Annemarie

Carol Jean said...

Well, this one has gone viral! This is the third place I've seen it today!

As the recipient of 20-years worth of blenders, crock pots and rice cookers, I IM'd dh a link to the ESV Study Bible at Amazon. He IM'd me back a bit of a grumpy response noting that I might as well buy it myself if I was going to be THAT specific. What's a girl to do? Sigh....maybe an electric skillet this year...the nonstick finish is just about worn off of mine....sigh....

Carol Jean said...

OK, I hit send and realized how utterly ungrateful that sounded. I am IMMENSELY grateful for my husband of 20 years! That I have a husband that has put up with me that long is a miracle and tribute to the supernatural work of God in both of our lives. The rest is small stuff. REALLY small stuff!!

DJP said...

Oh dear, that is a bit of a Catch-22, isn't it?

Well, one way would be to do a list of three or more things you'd like.

Or... well, here's a problem too.

I know how you women are. You're perfectly capable of just working into your conversation thinks along the lines of, "My, that Justin Taylor has made something like 43815432089 posts about how wonderful the ESV Study Bible is. It really sounds amazing!"

Trouble is, I know how we men are, too. Most of the time, we need to be clanged with a cast-iron skillet. Subtle observation is not our strong suit.

I forget how many days it was before my dear daughter gave up on hoping I'd notice a particular ring she was wearing.

)c:

Carol Jean said...

Ya mean you don't think sending a link to Amazon was clear enough?????? Today is my birthday, so I'm wondering if it will be something like my year 2000 gift (it was Y2K after all!) or 2005

He does mean well : )

Rita Martinez said...

I completely agree with the Amazon list, and with the No jewelery stuff...I always wear the same earrings and same necklace so who needs more than that...
But, I agree with the Jollyblogger:
"But it seems to me that an honest recognition that we blew it and a sincere apology ought to be be sufficient. If the wife or girlfriend wants to send you to the doghouse after that, then she's the one with the problem."

I remember our former youth pastor telling us about how he met his wife, and how for her birthday when they were getting to know each other he was supposed to bring the cake and he forgot, everybody was making such a big deal about it and he said to her, in private of course, that he was sincerely sorry but he had a lot of work to do and simply forgot and it could've happened to any other human being, and added that he wasn't seeking to impress her but to get to know her and be her friend...or something along those lines...that was pretty powerful, she was shocked but loved it.

Fred Butler said...

True story...
My wife seriously asked me once if a particular dress made her look fat.
I wittingly responded by saying, "No, your butt does."

I thought that was some great husband humor.

Needless to say...