Friday, February 16, 2007

And now, fathering in post-Christian America

And now, in the interest of equal-opportunity forehead-slapping, THIS.

The story is so wrong, on so many levels.

What it brings to mind is what I have said, many times, to my kids (and once to one of my cats):

Just because you can, doesn't mean you should.



striving... said...

I am just curious to know what your biggest issue is with this article? Just wondering?

Tone said...

Wow, that one distinction pretty much sums up an awful lot of what's wrong in the world today. We should have it tatooed on our foreheads when we're born...

DJP said...

Striving, the whole article. Just about everything.

He's a serial sperm donor. To these kids, he's their "father"—though he's done NOTHING to "father" them beyond being a sperm donor. Whereas legitimate parenting should be one of the ultimate acts of self-giving, this becomes an act of selfishness. In some cases, a man pleasures himself so a lesbian, or an unmarried woman (see article below), can pleasure herself. Or not. There are no moral boundaries set.

I have sympathy for childless, married, heterosexual couples who want children. But there has to be a place at which you say, "Okay, it's not God's good will for us to have children biologically. How about adoption?" Or something along those lines. There simply has to be a point beyond which one won't go in pursuit of having a child.

To look at it from the other side, read this very sad commentary. Again, there is so much that is so wrong on so many levels about that commentary, and neither the writer nor her single mother (much less the "donor") has the Biblical framework to make sense of it. It has created a nightmare world of unintended possibilities.

It all reminds me of what the character Dr. Ian Malcolm says in "Jurassic Park." Talking about their use of dinosaur DNA to bring the dinosaurs back into existence today, Malcolm says, "your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should."

Connie said...

Dan, you're right on when you said, "But there has to be a place at which you say, "Okay, it's not God's good will for us to have children biologically. How about adoption?" Or something along those lines. There simply has to be a point beyond which one won't go in pursuit of having a child."

My husband and I decided VERY early where that "point" was that we would not--COULD not--go beyond in pursuing biological children. I am sooooo glad that we did, and that I had a Xian OB/GYN who respected and encouraged us in our decisions. Believe me, there is/was a lot to consider/attempt, but just because we "could" did not mean we "should".

LeeC said...

But what about MY wants and felt needs Dan????

C.T. Lillies said...

What's the matter Dan? Haven't you ever heard of purpose driven parenting?

"...the word of God is not bound."
--2 Timothy 2:9

striving... said...

I see! Sometimes I get a little tunnel vision, and I do not think about all the bad effects things have on society. I always think about the joy it brings the woman whose husband cannot, ummmmmmmm "help," for lack of better words. Not trying to demean anything. But what you point out certainly brings a whole new spin on it. My all around opinion about this kind of sciencey stuff, (cloning, abortion, etc.) is it is like they are trying to play God, and he will judge justly.

DJP said...

I also am sympathetic about such situations. But if a wife accepts another man's sperm, then her husband is not the children's father. It's far too like adultery for my moral palate, and I think "playing God" is too close for comfort.

striving... said...

I only disagree because, just because a man can help create a baby does not mean he is a father, takes more than just creating to be a father. You know all about that right! Because you are a daddy. Of course her husband needs to be in complete agreement, or they can adopt, that is what I would do if I were in that situation.

striving... said...

I tried to go to the "Read this" in the comment, but nothing happened. try again, curiosity has got a hold on me.

DJP said...

Sorry, no idea how that happened.


As to the other. A woman is talking to Moses. She says, "I'm going to get another man's seed in me so I can have a baby. What do you think?"

If Abram were listening, would he say, "Yeah, I tried something like that myself"?

Is it penetration alone that makes for adultery?

striving... said...

Okay, I read it and all I can say is ouch, and oh my!!! Look, that is probably the situation with most of these. I did not know that it was like that. As to the other comment, No it is not only penetration, just the idea, thinking about it, is, right? So you know what I am going to do, I am going to pray about this. It is just like all the issues with abortion, cloning, etc. It is another issue that I have never really thought about before, and now I will. So thank you for that. You, and the girl that wrote the article, have shined some light on it for me.