Saturday, October 18, 2008

Steyn: Joe the Plumber vs. Joe the Hair-Plugger

Mark Steyn is one of the most masterful — and one of the funniest — wordsmiths writing today. He weighs in on Big 0 and the 0-bots versus the man whom history will simply know as "Joe the Plumber."

Read the whole article. Steyn surrounds the entire phenomenon with characteristic elegance. I just can't resist singling out a few particularly wonderful verbal morsels:
...our Fact Check Unit ran the numbers on the Obama tax-cut plan and the number is correct: “95.” It’s the words “per cent” immediately following that are wrong: that’s a typing error accidentally left in from the first draft. It should read: Under the Obama plan, 95 of the American people will get a tax cut.

...[0bama said,] “I think when you spread the wealth around, it’s good for everybody.”

In that sentence about you spreading the wealth around, there’s another typing error: that “you” should read “I, Barack.” “You” will have no say in it.

...President-presumptive Obama kindly explained the new exquisitely condescending “talking-down economics:” Put that in your pipe and solder it.

...[0bama is apparently] still willing to talk to Ahmadinejad without preconditions. But never again will he talk to Joe the Plumber without preconditions.

...Vast regiments of investigate reporters were redeployed from the Wasilla Holiday Inn back to the Lower 48.

...Alas, as a result of this massive investment of journalistic resouces, no investigative reporter will be free to investigate ACORN voter-registration fraud or Obama’s ties to terrorist educator William Ayers until, oh, midway through his second term at least.

...Joe is now the most notorious plumber in American politics since the Watergate plumbers. And they weren’t licensed, either.

...I’m with Joe the Plumber, not Joe the Hair-Plugger. He’s articulated the animating principles of America better than anyone on either side in this campaign. Which is why the O-Bots need to destroy him. As Obama’s catchphrase goes:

“Joe the Plumber!

Can we fix him?

Joe the Plumber!

Yes, we can!”

For the record, I am not a government-licensed pundit. But I expect they’ll fix that, too.

4 comments:

candy said...

Dan. Have you noticed all the cars heading east on Highway 80? Yep. We have been innundated by ACORN people from YOUR state. They are everywhere, plodding along in birkenstocks and faded Indian tunics. They canvas the neighborhoods like anti-Mormon pairs armed with registrations instead of the Book of Mormon.

I talked with a lady who is an advocate for mentally disabled adults. She says her clients have been approached numerous times, have numerous voter registrations, and have been strongly advised to vote for Obama.

Ted said...

OBAMA + DEM CONG = USA RIP

DJP said...

Candy — reportedly Obama's thugs manipulated a mentally-=handicapped man into votting for 0, when he'd wanted to vote for McCain.

Fred Butler said...

My favorite Joe conspiracy of the moment