Thursday, January 07, 2010

Top ten movie lines (I use most frequently)

My first top ten list, I think, is not one of those suggested.

My family, groaning and rolling eyes, will probably attest that I use these all the time. The forms below are as I use them, and may not match absolutely verbatim the form in the movies.
  1. Sometimes irony can be pretty ironic (Airplane 2). Shatner's turn as a self-parody in that movie is absolutely hysterical. I wish I could buy a sanitized version of it and the first Airplane movie.
  2. I'll retire to Bedlam (Scrooge, 1951). The best version of The Christmas Carol, with the best actor ever to play Scrooge.
  3. Well, now we know [he can do] that (My Favorite Year). I recall virtually nothing about that utterly-forgettable movie... except that line.
  4. Learn to live with disappointment (Princess Bride). This movie is a goldmine of quotable lines.
  5. You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means (Princess Bride).
  6. And so, without further eloquence... (Quiet Man). One of my favorite movies, ever. If you haven't seen it,  you must.
  7. Endeavor to persevere (Outlaw Josey Wales). One of Eastwood's best.
  8. And that's...bad? (Emperor's New Groove)  Hysterical cartoon, absolutely hysterical. I picture the writers cracking up as they wrote it.
  9. Why do we even have that lever? (Emperor's New Groove)  The late Eartha Kitt sounds like she had a blast voicing the evil Yzma.
  10. You threw off my groove! (Emperor's New Groove)
Feel free to offer your most-used movie lines.

    94 comments:

    Steven R. Robertson said...

    "Give us the gate key."

    "What gate key?"

    "Fezzik, tear his arms off."

    "Oh, you mean this gate key."

    DJP said...

    Once you start quoting Princess Bride, there's pretty much no stopping.

    SandMan said...

    My favorite movies will tend to be bush league, or sophomoric, or whatever, but here goes:

    "We got no money, we got no jobs, our pets heads are falling off!"

    (Dumb and Dumber-- someone tore off their pet bird's head... and they were too dumb to realize that it wasn't that "he was pretty old." I use this one when things seem to be going badly).

    "Underneath the clothes, you will find a man. Underneath the man, you will find his...nucleus."

    (Nacho Libre... This is a clean movie. Cannot think of any skin/inuendo, or cursing)

    Fred Butler said...

    Yes. PB is good like that. Especially Wallace Shawn's character who's name escapes me at the moment.

    I also like "I'm still geeking out about it" From the Incredibles

    I'll think of some more throughout the day.

    DJP said...

    Vizzini!

    JackW said...

    I’d contribute, but a man's got to know his limitations.

    Unknown said...

    I'm not a witch...I'm your wife!
    (especially bad when we've translated it into Spanish and quote it that way)

    Have fun storming the castle boys!

    May the farce be with you (Space Balls)

    We are the Knights that say NI!
    Now we are the Knights that say icky icky! (Monthy Python)

    I'll just stop there - I say too many!

    DJP said...

    Oh Jack, that's got to be my #11, or close to it.

    Barbara said...

    So long, and thanks for all the fish!

    Stuck in my head since reading Mohler's piece this morning.

    Jeremy Morgan said...

    My family is tired of hearing me quote the storming the castle line. It's nice to see others use it too.

    jazzact13 said...

    "When what's left of you gets around to getting what's left to be gotten, what's left to be gotten won't be worth getting whatever's left of you."
    Danny Kay's character in "White Christmas"

    trogdor said...

    Shop smart, shop S-Mart!

    Give me some sugar, baby.

    Yeah, and maybe I'm a Chinese jet pilot.

    Good, bad. I'm the guy with the gun.

    That's it, go ahead and run. Run home and cry to mama! Me? I'm through runnin!

    Look, maybe I didn't say every single little tiny syllable, no. But basically I said them, yeah.

    Klaatu, varada, n(cough).

    Lady I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave the store.

    Name's Ash. Housewares.

    What, were you raised in a barn? Probably were raised in a barn, bunch of primitives...

    Sure, I could have stayed in the past. Could've even been made king. But in my own way, I am king. Hail to the king, baby.

    Honey, you got reeal ugly.

    You see this? This... is my boomstick! The twelve-gauge double-barreled Remington. S-Mart's top of the line. You can find this in the sporting goods department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about a hundred and nine, ninety five. It's got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair trigger. That's right. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart. You got that?

    I may be back later with something not said by Bruce Campbell. We'll see.

    DJP said...

    heh, I was going to say, "I see someone's a huge Bruce Campbell fan."

    Anonymous said...

    "He chose...poorly" - Indiana Jones & Quest for the Grail

    Anything, and I mean ANYTHING from the Princess Bride. "Anybody want a peanut?"

    "One more step and I'll be farther from home than I've ever been." Samwise Gamgee, Fellowship of the Ring.

    "And now for something completely different." Monty Python.

    "Watch yer topknot, pilgrim." "Yep, you watch your'n." Jeremiah Johnson.

    I'll stop now, there are too many...

    (Verification word: kablamsi. I found a new favorite word for today.)

    Anonymous said...

    Oh yeah, and many more lines from Big Trouble in Little China. Anything said by Jack Burton.

    "Like I told my last wife, I never drive faster than I can see and besides, it's all in the reflexes."

    "Six demon bag!"

    "Have I paid my dues? The check's in the mail."

    (Verification word: chest. Just keeps gettin' better.)

    Al said...

    Here are some I use -

    In moments of less-than-familial bliss: "What? Are you kidding me... We got us a family here!"

    When my children feel, ummm... constrained: "Prison life is structured - more'n some people care for"

    Both of those from the same movie.

    When one of the kids questions why one of his/her siblings is the beneficiary of some great parental injustice: "He's bona fide"

    al sends

    Jugulum said...

    I must confess to being an insufferable quoter of Monty Python and the Holy Grail. We are, of course, the jackals of the humor ecosystem.

    I haven't seen Scrooge, but I have a hard time imagining that it could surpass the Muppet Christmas Carol.

    Associate-to-the-Pastor said...

    'Get that corn outta my face!'
    -Nacho Libre

    'Killer boots, man.'
    -Dumb and Dumber

    'Maybe it's cause I'm Irish.'
    -Shawshank Redemption

    'It was terrible, what happened to this kid's Mum. But driving fast behind the ambulance was fantastic.'
    -About a Boy

    'But it is not this day!'
    -Return of the King

    'You gonna do something, or just stand there and bleed?'
    -Tombstone

    'Never heard of it.'
    -The Dirty Dozen

    'I was born a poor black child.'
    -The Jerk

    'The Suspense is killing me. I hope it lasts.'
    -Willy Wonka

    Brad Williams said...

    These are most often quoted at my children. Please do not call DHR. You may have fun adding the contexts at your imaginations pleasure.

    "Dyin' ain't much of a livin', boy."

    "Badges? We ain't got no badges. We don't need no badges! I don't have to show you any stinkin' badges!

    "Go ahead, make my day."

    "Inconceivable!"

    "Are you serious, Clark?" (Christmas Vacation)

    That's off the top of my head.

    GrammaMack said...

    "There he goes off to his room to write that hit song 'Alone in my principles.'"

    I'm used to hearing "It's a line from a movie" when my middle son and his wife say something odd to each other and I look at them, perplexed. Now I often just ask, "A line from a movie?" and get an affirmative answer. :-)

    Brad Williams said...

    Dan,

    Your comment on the "Airplane" movies reminds me of a post I once wrote but never published because I was afraid people wouldn't get the humor. It was: Top Ten Movies I'm Glad I Saw Before I Got Saved.

    Conan the Barbarian got the top honor, I think.

    SandMan said...

    YAY! Associate-to-the-Pastor:
    Thanks for owning up to an appreciation of Dumb and Dumber and Nacho Libre. I was afraid I'd be the only one.

    Now for a couple of manlier ones (to be quoted in your best Scottish brogue):

    "All men die. Few men turly live!"

    Shamus: "I don't want to be a martyr William."

    Wallace: "Nor do I. I want to live a raise a family. But you know what will happen if we do not try."

    Shamus: "What?"

    Wallace: "Nothing."

    Last one:
    "Aye, fight and you may die. Run, and you'll live... at least a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!"

    SandMan said...

    And Brad: Christmas Vacation! Also a favorite with my extended family and I.

    "Save the neck for me Clark."

    NoLongerBlind said...

    (with heavy Greek accent)
    "You don't eat meat?
    No problem; we fix lamb."

    (BFG wedding)

    Neil said...

    It's not a tumour.

    NewManNoggs said...

    Sorry DJP, the best Josey Wales quote is: "Dyin' ain't much of a livin', boy."

    NewManNoggs said...

    Nacho Libre:
    "Do you remember when everyone was shouting my name, and I used my strength to rip my blouse."

    Tombstone:
    "I know Ike, let's have a spelling contest."

    "So run you cur. And tell the other curs the law is coming. You tell 'em I'm coming! And Hell's coming with me you hear! Hell's coming with me!"

    Dirty Harry:
    "A man's got to know his limitations."

    DJP said...

    NMN, quite right. OJW is a goldmine of quotables... many of which, unfortunately, cannot be repeated on this blog.

    NewManNoggs said...

    I would include "Three Amigos" in that somewhat dubious company.

    "Would you say I have a plethora of pinatas, Jefe?'"

    "Lip balm?"

    The Squirrel said...

    "I am so smart! And they are so dumb!" - Sheriff Bart Blazing Saddles (yes, I know, I know... but it is one of the best anti-racism movies ever made!)

    ~Squirrel

    NewManNoggs said...

    Okay, I'm flooding the comments, so this will be my last.

    Brad said,

    "...Top Ten Movies I'm Glad I Saw Before I Got Saved.

    Conan the Barbarian got the top honor, I think."

    How could you not include possibly the greatest quote in the history of cinema?

    (Conan when asked what is good in life) "To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women."

    Okay. I'm done. Sorry.

    NewManNoggs said...

    Okay, I lied. Dan your readership is quite impressive in their cinematic tastes.

    While I agree that anything Jack Burton says in Big Trouble is spectacular, my favorite line belongs to Lo Pan:
    "There have been others, to be sure. There are always others. But you know, Mr. Burton, the difficulties between men and women. How seldom it works out? Yet we all keep trying, like fools."

    DJP said...

    And before that line:

    Lo Pan: And when I find her, I will marry her...

    Wang Chi: Never!

    Lo Pan: Ching Dai will be appeased, my curse will be lifted!

    Jack Burton: And you can go on to rule the universe from beyond the grave.

    Lo Pan: Indeed!

    Jack Burton: Or check into a psycho ward, whichever comes first, right?

    FREE SEO Site Assessment said...

    When my kids start complaining of things that have gone wrong I usually tack a "cats and dogs, living together. Mass hysteria!" on the end.

    Then they look at me weird.

    Herding Grasshoppers said...

    "That is quite possibly the stupidest man who ever lived... maybe we should shoot him."
    (Ruthless People)

    "Jefe, do you know what a plethora is?" (The Three Amigos)

    "I know." (Preceded by Princess Leia announcing her love for Han Solo.)

    "Have fun storming the ______" We fill in the blank with anything. (Princess Bride)

    Gunnar says,
    "Oooooo, it's a toaster!"
    (Scrooged)

    Tate says,
    "We came to save you, Master."
    "Good job."
    (Star Wars, Episode 2)

    Wyatt says,
    "For certain, you have to be lost to find somewhere that can't be found. Otherwise, everyone would know where it is."
    (Pirates of the Caribbean 3)

    All the boys love,
    "Just a recap, I come in peace, I mean you no harm, and you all will die." (MvA)

    NewManNoggs said...

    TOUCHE!

    And just the fact that he calls him "Dave."

    Herding Grasshoppers said...

    Oh, and,

    "I do not think that word means what you think it means."

    Kim said...

    Well, you already used the Scrooge line, which is one of mine.

    Anonymous said...

    Continuing with the Big Trouble in Little China theme:

    Burton: "I don't get it"
    Pan: "You weren't put on earth to get it".

    Never was enthralled with that flick, but the Burton character was tough to dislike.

    How about Spicoli in Fast Times at Ridgemont High (another movie for which I cared little, save for this exchange):
    "We left this England place because it was bogus. We need cool rules, pronto, or we'll be bogus, too."

    Anonymous said...

    Continuing with the Big Trouble in Little China theme:

    Burton: "I don't get it"
    Pan: "You weren't put on earth to get it".

    Never was enthralled with that flick, but the Burton character was tough to dislike.

    How about Spicoli in Fast Times at Ridgemont High (another movie for which I cared little, save for this exchange):
    "We left this England place because it was bogus. We need cool rules, pronto, or we'll be bogus, too."

    Fred Butler said...

    "You'll never find such a wretched hive of scum and villainy. We must be cautious."

    "Hold me like you did by the lake on Naboo."

    DJP said...

    Deathless prose, Butler. Deathless prose.

    mike said...

    The entire script of Princess bride, toth to;
    "and yet he gains"
    "I am not left handed either"
    "my way is not very sportsman like"
    most used
    "get used to disappointment"

    "so you're saying there's a chance"
    D & D

    greatest tough guy threat
    "if you're lying, i'm gonna come back and kill you in your kitchen"
    a much younger segal in Above the Law

    lee n. field said...

    "Feel free to offer your most-used movie lines. "


    "Run away! run away!", from that other great mine of quotable quotes, Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

    "'ats no ordinarrrrrry rrrrabbit! 'e's got a mean streak a mile wide!"

    lee n. field said...

    "Aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?"

    DJP said...

    The lines in the post are current ones. Were I to reach back into lines I've ever used (less frequently, or in the past), we'd be talking spaghetti westerns, more Eastwood, etc.

    Like

    "'I-- i-- idi---'"
    "'Idiots.' It's for you."

    SandMan said...

    "Hold me like you did by the lake on Naboo."

    HAHAHA!

    That is the coldest piece of lifeless acting ever seen on the silver screen.

    Well-played, sir.

    I use this one (actually play it from my blackberry) with my students in class.

    "You lose. You get NOTHING! Good day, sir!"

    -Willy Wonka...

    CGrim said...

    I love love love Emperor's New Groove

    JackW said...

    "The more they overthink the plumbing, the easier it is to stop up the drain."

    Anonymous said...

    You've created a Monster.
    I could go on at length from Fletch :
    "I'm afraid I'm gonna have to pull rank on you. I didn't want to have to do this. I'm with the Mattress Police. There are no tags on these mattresses. "
    Chief Karlin: So, what's your name?
    Fletch: Fletch.
    Chief Karlin: Full name?
    Fletch: Fletch F. Fletch.
    Chief Karlin: I see, And what do you do for a living, Mr. Fletch?
    Fletch: I'm a shepherd.

    "Hey! It's all ball bearings nowadays."

    mike said...

    from Paint your wagon:
    You should read the Bible, Mr. Rumson.
    I have read the Bible, Mrs. Fenty.
    Didn't that discourage you about drinking?
    No, but it sure killed my appetite for readin'!

    Autumn Beck said...

    We needed the meat!
    -robin hood: prince of theives

    I don't think he knows about second breakfast.
    -LOTR: FoTR

    Teenie said...

    From "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" (in the lost days) after Spicoli crashes the football players Camaro:

    "Awww, bogus dude. But don't worry, my dad's a TV repairman and has an awesome set of tools."

    Unknown said...

    I'm surprised nobody said this one yet...

    "IT'S A TRAP!!"
    - Admiral Ackbar

    "Groovy."
    - Bruce Campbell

    "Are you aware of Garfield?!?"
    - Marlena, Cloverfield

    "Have you ever been in a Turkish prison?"
    - Airplane

    Kirby said...

    Pretty much Princess Bride is hte most quotable in human history.

    Humperdink: "Iocane Powder. I'd bet my life on it."

    Wesley: "As you wish"


    Airplane (which I saw the year it came out, and never since): "Surely you jest?"
    "No, I don't. and stop calling me Shirley"


    And Mike, your Paint the Wagon quote is priceless.

    Kerry said...

    "You're not so tough without your CAR!" -Kgrtn Cop

    "Rambo NOT expendable!"- Rambo IIX(?)

    "Old Earth proverb says "only Nixon could go to
    China"" - Star Trek IIX(?)

    "you're a busy man,,,," MP&HolyGrail

    "Could I be mistaken, or have my children been traipsing about Salsburg wearing nothing but
    CURTAINS?!" Sound of Music

    "Oh look, a man got squished,,,," SwissFamRobins

    "sometimes, when you're man, you must wear the
    stretchy pants" Nacho L

    DJP said...

    1st = best, Kerry.

    NewManNoggs said...

    "There are some who would call me...Tim."

    "People scare better when their dyin'"

    "No, you brought two too many."

    "But didn't I always tell you honey, if I just stayed in place and never spoke up, good things are bound to happen."

    Fred Butler said...

    Fletch-

    Dr. - "What did you say your last name was?"

    Fletch - "Babbar"

    Dr - "Isn't that like a series of elephant books?"

    Fletch - "I wouldn't know, I don't have any?"

    Dr - "Children?"

    Fletch - "Oh no. elephant books."

    I swear I used that elephant book line in a conversation just last week.

    DJP said...

    I'm learning things about my readers that I... well... I just don't know.

    If we could just get Johnson and Turk to weigh in.

    trogdor said...

    Someplace warm. A place where the beer flows like wine. Where beautiful women instinctively flock like the salmon of Capistrano. I'm talking about a little place called Aspen. (Dumb & Dumber)

    His head fell off. Yeah, he was pretty old. (D&D)

    Starts with an S! Let's see. Swim? Swami? Slippy? Slappy? Swenson? Swanson? Oh here it is, Samsonite! I was way off. (D&D)

    Hey, look, the Monkees. They were a huge influence on the Beatles. (D&D)

    Why you going to the airport? Flying somewhere? (D&D)

    I care! (Episode IV)

    This is my new mop. George, my friend, he gave me this mop. This is a pretty good mop. It's not as good as my first mop. I miss my first mop, but this is still a good mop. Sometimes you just hafta take what life gives ya, 'cause life is like a mop and sometimes life gets full of dirt and crud and bugs and hairballs and stuff... you, you, you gotta clean it out. You, you, you gotta put it in here and rinse it off and start all over again and, and sometimes, sometimes life sticks to the floor so bad you know a mop, a mop, it's not good enough, it's not good enough. You, you gotta get down there, like, with a toothbrush, you know, and you gotta, you gotta really scrub 'cause you gotta get it off. You gotta really try to get it off. But if that doesn't work, that doesn't work, you can't give up. You gotta, you gotta stand right up. You, you gotta run to a window and say, "Hey! These floors are dirty as hell, and I'm not gonna take it any more!" (UHF)

    Kuni: Ahhh, a red snapper. Mmmmm, very tasty. Okay, Weaver, listen carefully. You can hold on to your red snapper, or you can go for what's in the box that Hiro-San is bringing down the aisle right now! What's it gonna be?
    Phyllis Weaver: I'll take the box. The box!
    [applause]
    Kuni: You took the box? Let's see what's in the box!
    Kuni: Nothing! Absolutely nothing! STUPID! You're so STU-PIIIIIIIIIIID! (UHF)

    For those of you just joining us, today we're teaching poodles how to fly. (UHF)

    Oh, Joel Miller, you've just found the marble in the oatmeal. You're a lucky, lucky, lucky little boy. 'Cause you know why? You get to drink from... the FIRE HOSE! (UHF)

    Not many people know this, but the turtle is nature's suction cup. (UHF)

    Sure, women are great. After the torture. (The Man Who Knew Too Little)

    He hates these cans. Stay away from the cans. (The Jerk)

    Lord loves a workin' man; don't trust whitey; see a doctor and get rid of it. (The Jerk)

    The new phone book's here! The new phone book's here! Page 73 - Johnson, Navin R.! I'm somebody now! (The Jerk)

    You mean I'm gonna stay this color? (The Jerk)

    mike said...

    Buckaroo bonzai
    "remember, no matter where you go, there you are".

    "Laugh while you can, monkey-boy."

    "History is made at night. Character is what you are in the dark."

    mike said...

    What about Bob?

    Bob: What are we doing?
    Dr. Leo: Death Therapy, Bob. It's a guaranteed cure.

    Kerry said...

    Sorry, my brain is somewhat of a repository for
    movie lines:

    "But this one goes to eleven"- Spinal Tap

    "what we had,,,was a prehistoric monument,,,
    in danger of being trampled,,,,BY A DWARF!"-ST

    "Gentlemen! You can't fight in here! This is the
    War Room,,,,," Dr Strangeglove

    "Don't worry, our Germans are better than their
    Germans"- The Right Stuff

    "look after Mr. Bond,,,see to it that some harm
    comes to him" The Spy Who Loved Me

    ",,,,but as for you, lady, you can just DROP DEAD!"
    " Okay, so we all agree on that,,,,"Its a Madx4 World

    ",,,,did they just GIVE UP when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor,,,,NO! ("Don't stop him,
    he's on a roll,,,,") Animal house

    "oh- I'm sorry, to call you stupid would be an
    insult,,,,TO STUPID PEOPLE!" A fish called wanda

    "oh-no! Here c-c-comes K-K-Ken to k-k-k-KILL
    me!" a f c w

    not to mention just about anything from "o brother
    where art thou",,,,

    jrbaker said...

    Three Amigos:

    "Sew, old woman, sew like the wind!"

    (Insert verb of your choice.)

    "Do you have anything here besides Mexican food?"

    BTLC:

    "Here's to the Army and Navy and the battles they have won; here's to America's colors, the colors that never run. May the wings of liberty never lose a feather."

    Kim said...

    "Beuhler? Beuhler?"

    Aaron said...

    #1 "I am the law!!!" Judge Dredd (particually helpful when explaining to wife and kid why I made a particular decision).

    #2 "There is no charge for awesomeness... or attractiveness" Kung Fu Panda

    #3 You have been weighed, you have been measured, and you have been found wanting. Come back when you're worthy. A Knight's Tale

    #4 This is my word. And as such is beyond contestation. A knight's Tale (very useful when asserting a fact to wife)

    #5 Make it so. Picard from STTNG (useful when asking for things)

    #6 I'm a genius, not an engineer. The Man in the Iron Mask

    #7 I remember that sound. That's a bad sound. GalaxyQuest

    #8 I just ate, so I'm still digesting, so my kung fu may not be as good as later on. Kung Fu Panda (I replace kung fu with all sorts of things).

    #9 Never give up. Never surrender. GalaxyQuest

    #10 A knight is sworn to valor. His heart knows only virtue. His blade defends the helpless. His might upholds the weak. His word speaks only truth. His wrath undoes the wicked! Dragonheart. I don't use it, but I love the line anyways as a moral statement.

    Honorable Mentions:
    Question: "Is that just because you are holier than everybody else?
    Answer: Well, there is that, but also because I'm more intelligent than everybody else. - The Man in the Iron Mask

    "One often meets his destiny on the road he takes to avoid it" - Kung Fu Panda

    "Skadoosh" - Kung Fu Panda

    jrbaker said...

    Mike: My wife and I use the "Is this corn hand shucked?" line from What About Bob all the time, and usually get strange looks because no one knows what we're referencing!

    Missy said...

    I've always found Moonstruck quotes handy on tons of occasions:

    "I just want you to know no matter what you do, you're gonna die, just like everybody else."

    "It costs money. It costs money because it saves money."

    "I ain't no freakin' monument to justice! I lost my hand! I lost my bride! Johnny has his hand! Johnny has his bride! You want me to take my heartache, put it away and forget?"

    "I'm confused!"

    "Yes, Mrs. Castorini, I would LOVE some oatmeal."

    Fred Butler said...

    People keep stirring my mind with their entries...

    "Baby steps to the elevator. Baby steps to the door, etc."

    "Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming swimming." Finding Nemo.

    "It's shiny" Finding Nemo.

    jmb said...

    THREE AMIGOS (during a tense moment, when time is of the essence):

    Lucky Day: In a way, each of us has an El Guapo to face. For some, shyness might be their El Guapo. For others, a lack of education might be their El Guapo. For us, El Guapo is a big, dangerous man who wants to kill us. But as sure as my name is Lucky Day, the people of Santa Poco can conquer their own personal El Guapo, who also happens to be the actual El Guapo!

    PATHS OF GLORY:

    [the condemned men are awaiting execution]
    Corporal Paris: See that cockroach? Tomorrow morning, we'll be dead and it'll be alive. It'll have more contact with my wife and child than I will. I'll be nothing, and it'll be alive.
    [Ferol smashes the roach]
    Private Ferol: Now you got the edge on him.

    THE BIG LEBOWSKI:

    The Dude: Yeah, well. The Dude abides.
    The Stranger: The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that. It's good knowin' he's out there. The Dude. Takin' 'er easy for all us sinners. Shoosh. I sure hope he makes the finals.

    ANNIE HALL:

    [Alvy has killed two spiders]
    Alvy Singer: I did it. I killed 'em both.
    [Annie starts crying]
    Alvy Singer: What's the matter? What are you sad about? What did you want me to do? Capture 'em and rehabilitate 'em?

    Colloquist said...

    "One ping only, Vasili."

    "Conn, sonar! Crazy Ivan!"

    "There is little room in Tupolev's heart for anyone but Tupolev."
    (Hunt for Red October)

    "It's just a flesh wound!"

    "Fetchez la vache!"

    "K-nig-hts..."

    "You can't wield supreme executive authority just because some watery tart threw a sword at you."

    "Brrrrrrrrring me a shrubbery!"
    -Python/Grail

    "Oh, Johnny, I forgot you were there. You may go now."

    "That's not what he said, you ignorant wretch."
    -Tombstone

    "Oh yeah. You blend."

    Not a quote, but we call any convenience mart "Sac O Suds," and young people are "yutes."
    -My Cousin Vinny

    threegirldad said...

    "What...we've...got...here is...failure to communicate."

    "That does put a damper on our relationship."

    "You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you."

    "If you were any other man, I would kill you where you stand."

    "Why don't you call me sometime when you have no class?"

    "Who dares enter the sacred and awesome presence of the everlasting know-it-all?!" [I don't say this one, I play the sound file -- when someone walks up to my desk to ask a question]

    Unknown said...

    My most frequently quoted lines changed considerably when I was married 6 years ago. My wife thinks some of the movies that I used to love are either boring or stupid. So, here is my married list in no particular order:

    - "Lucky!" Napoleon Dynamite

    - "You threw off my grove!" The Emporer's New Groove

    - "Pardon my intrusion." Sense and Sensibility

    - "Were I not an old married man, I should gladly do the job." Emma

    - "To the idiot-mobile!" Not from a movie, but from a Seinfeld episode and one of my favorites.

    - "No touchy." Emporer's New Groove
    (ENG)

    - "Boo-yeah!" ENG

    MSC said...

    "Dying ain’t so hard for men like you and me. It’s living that’s hard."
    OJW to Ten Bears.

    MSC said...

    "They keep coming up with new ways to celebrate mediocrity!"
    Mr. Incredible

    Susan said...

    Trogdor, thanks for the UHF quotes. Besides the "STUPID!! SO STUPID!!" that you mentioned, I find the following simply hilarious:

    1. From Gandhi in the "Gandhi II" trailer: "Give me a steak, medium rare."

    2. From "Conan the Libarian": "Don't you know the Dewey decimal system??"

    2. "SUPPLIES!!" (exclaimed the karate masters when they suddenly appeared from behind the door marked "SUPPLIES" room to help save UHF)

    JackW said...

    "DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE WORDS THAT ARE COMIN' OUTTA MY MOUTH!?!"

    jazzact13 said...

    "Squirrel!!" Up

    DJP said...

    Good point, Jazz. That's actually rising on our list, too. "Squirrel!"

    Aaron said...

    Based on people's favorite quotes, it's pretty easy to see who has kids...LOL.

    threegirldad said...

    "DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE WORDS THAT ARE COMIN' OUTTA MY MOUTH!?!"

    "Don't NOBODY unduhstand the words comin' outta yo mouth, man!"

    greglong said...

    jmb, that is one of my all-time favorite lines...the one from Three Amigos. I laugh everytime I see it. It reminds of preachers who talk about how we each have our own personal "Goliaths". I'm glad that someone else finds that line so funny.

    greglong said...

    Anything from Emperor's New Groove (LOVE that movie), Napoleon Dynamite, Nacho Libre (glad to see others appreciate that humor, too), and Three Amigos.

    "Looks like someone's been in here with the ugly stick." Always a good quote to use when entering any gathering. (Three Amigos)

    "This woman has to be gotten to a hospital."
    "A hospital? What is it?"
    "It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now." (Airplane)

    "I'm a little concerned right now...about your salvation and stuff." (Nacho Libre)

    "I hate all the orphans in the whole world." (NL)

    "Roll, you fool!!!" (NL)

    "OK, maybe I am not meant for these duties. Cooking duty. Dead guy duty. Maybe it's time for me to get a better duty!" (NL)

    "Would you like to join me in my quarters this night, for some toast?" (NL)

    "Your mom goes to college." (Napoleon Dynamite)

    "This is the worst movie ever made."
    "Napoleon, like anyone could ever know that." (ND)

    "Man, I wish I could back in time. I'd take state." (ND)

    "I caught you a delicious bass." (ND)

    "Do the chickens have large talons?" (ND)

    "Napoleon, give me some of your tots!" (ND)

    "You threw off my groove!" (Emperor's New Groove)

    "What's with the chimp and the bug?" (ENG)

    "NO TOUCHY!" (ENG)

    "For the last time, I did NOT order a giant trampoline!" (ENG)

    greglong said...

    I have a confession to make.

    Are you ready?

    Here goes.

    I don't like Princess Bride. I don't think it's all that funny.

    *ducks and runs for cover*

    DJP said...

    Hm. Disconcerting.

    We may have to request your testimony.

    greglong said...

    "I do not like the cone of shame." (Up)

    "Bring out your dead!" (Monty Python and the Holy Grail)

    "Listen, Alice..."
    "Herbert."
    "Herbert..." (MPatHG)

    "Please! This is supposed to be a happy occasion. Let's not bicker and argue over who killed who." (MPatHG)

    "One...two...five..."
    "Three, sir!"
    "Three" (MPatHG)

    "One day, lad, all this will be yours!"
    "What, the curtains?" (MPatHG)

    "She turned me into a newt!" [Everyone stares questioningly]
    "I got better." (MPatHG)

    "Are gringos falling from the sky?"
    [Ned falls from above and lands with a thud.]
    "Yes, El Guapo." (Three Amigos)

    "Do you know what 'nada' means?"
    "Isn't it a light chicken gravy?" (TA)

    "[Grandma] said she doesn't want you here when she gets back because you've been ruining everybody's lives and eating all our steak." (ND)

    "Take a look at what I'm wearing, people. You think anybody wants a roundhouse kick to the face while I'm wearing these bad boys?" (ND)

    "Just tell them that their wildest dreams will come true if they vote for you." (ND)

    Sorry...this is fun.

    jmb said...

    greglong wrote:

    jmb, that is one of my all-time favorite lines...the one from Three Amigos. I laugh everytime I see it. It reminds of preachers who talk about how we each have our own personal "Goliaths".

    Exactly.

    And thanks for having the guts to say that "The Princess Bride" isn't that funny. Christians, in particular, greatly overrate that movie, imo. The 2007 movie "Stardust" is similar, and better.

    I think the final line from Quentin Tarantino's latest film may become a classic. Since there are probably quite a few who haven't yet seen the movie, I won't quote it.

    MSC said...

    "I forgot to store acorns for the winter and now I am dead."
    Up

    trogdor said...

    I can totally understand how someone wouldn't like The Princess Bride. For example, he could completely lack a sense of humor.

    "Gee lady, you're real nice. If I didn't have puke breath, I'd kiss ya." Strange Brew

    I also routinely use the Star Wars lines which are much improved by substituting the word 'pants', such as "I find your lack of pants disturbing" or "Han will have those pants down, we've got to give him more time!" But that's a whole different category.

    greglong said...

    jmb,

    Someday I hope to preach a sermon on David and Goliath and say:

    In a way, each of us has a Goliath to face. For some, shyness might be their Goliath. For others, a lack of education might be their Goliath. For David, Goliath was a big, dangerous man who wanted to kill him. But as sure as my name is Pastor Greg, we'll see today from the Bible that David was able to conquer his own personal Goliath, who also happened to be the actual Goliath!

    trogdor,

    Lacking a sense of humor is something I've never been accused of. I just think the humor in that movie is highly overrated. But I know to many people that is inconceivable. (See, I can throw a good PB line out there every once in a while.)

    jmb said...

    greglong: Funny.

    trogdor wrote: I can totally understand how someone wouldn't like The Princess Bride. For example, he could completely lack a sense of humor.

    This helps to confirm my view that many believers take an almost proprietary interest in Princess Bride (which is not unfunny, just overrated). The same could be said for The Shawshank Redemption, but that's another story.

    Unknown said...

    Not Possible.

    -Autopilot

    Anonymous said...

    Dan,

    Movie quotes are a-flyin'...

    Here's just a sample from my family:

    "For any single man who possess a large fortune, must be in want of a wife." Pride & Prejudice

    "She's tolerable, I suppose, but not handsome enough to tempt me." P & P

    "Maurice, you did not raise your hand, therefore, your hideous comment will be stricken from the record." Madagascar

    "Does anybody else have the heebie-jeebies? No? Good! So shut-up! Madagascar

    "They are just a bunch of pansies!" Madagascar

    "I don't want to be a pie! I don't like gravy!" Chicken Run

    "Your mother was a hamster and your father stank of elderberries! And if you don't leave, I'll taunt you a second time." Monty Python & the Holy Grail

    Mrs. Beaver: "You're worse than Beaver on bath day."
    Mr. Beaver: "Bath Day! Worse day of the year!" Narnia

    "He's so cute! I just want to dunk him in my coffee!" Madagascar

    Shoeless Joe Jackson: "Is this heaven?"
    Ray: "No. It's Iowa." Field of Dreams

    "Not yet.." Gladiator

    "What an amazing, modern age we live in." Master & Commander

    "If I'm going to die, I want to be well-dressed." The Patriot

    "It's my island!" Braveheart

    "Stop him! He's carrying scissors and hand cream!" Madagascar 2

    "Certainty of death, small chance of success...what are we waiting for?" Return of the King

    "Ryan, be careful what you shoot at. Most things in here don't react too well to bullets." Hunt for Red October

    "It's a lance! Helloooo!" Knight's Tale

    "Yes, I lied. I give the truth scope." Knight's Tale

    "I..love...this...house!" Money Pit

    "Get it out, Son. It's the beginning of wisdom." Evan Almighty

    "Yo, Brethren! What-up with thee?"
    Bruce Almighty

    "I'd drive my tires over a mile of busted glass to see that pi-thur right thar." Cars trailer

    "I'm a good girl, I am!" My Fair Lady

    "I do believe in spooks! I do believe in spooks! I do, I do, I do believe in spooks!" Wizard of Oz

    ...and we could go on!