Idle thoughts about stardom

Every time I see this picture — and it is often — I think, "That poor woman."

Think of it. She's probably a nice lady, pleasant-looking, lovely singing voice. Her friends said, "You're so lovely — you know, you really should go into modeling or something." "Really? Do you think so?" "Sure! What could go wrong?"

And here's her face, like that, for God and everyone to see... forever.

I mean, that's the sort of face concerning which our mothers used to say, "What if your face froze that way?" For this poor woman, in effect, it has. Oh sure, a second later, she was back to her normal pleasant self — but the bloodless, merciless eye of the camera had already blinked. Snap!

It's like I sometimes think when I'm watching a movie, and the crowd is running away from the dinosaur, and one guy trips, let's out a Wilhelm (not even his actual voice),  and... squish! Or Superman flies by, and one guy looks up and says "Gee!" Or Spiderman swings by a crowd of faces, one of them scratching his nose.

I think, if I'd gone into acting, I'd be saying to my friends, "Okay, wait for it... wait for it... there! See that guy? That was me!"

And that'd be my big Hollywood career.

(Well, it could be worse.)